The System Mistook Me for a Cat

Although the rules required wearing masks, once everyone left the room, their masks started to become askew.

The other four members of the Dog Team were regular guests on the show, and familiar viewers could easily identify them by their clothes and body types.

Even so, everyone had pushed their masks to the top of their heads or had them hanging sideways on their foreheads, showing at least half of their faces.

The audience could recognize them, but considerate variety show performers shouldn't make viewers work hard to guess... Of course, for dramatic effect, they would properly put their masks back on before encountering the Cat Team.

The Alaskan went downstairs to catch people, while Chu Tingwu arrived at the "Mad Scientist Central Laboratory."

The building had seven floors, but considering the show's effect, the production team only used five floors, with the laboratory on the fifth floor.

Moreover, this was previously a commercial area, and although many rooms had locks, they were actually transparent or had frosted floor-to-ceiling glass.

The "Central Laboratory" was such a room, originally an open employee break room with sofas, benches, and gaming consoles. It remained open now, just with added seating in the middle.

During the show, Cat Team members would pick up various rule cards while going upstairs, gradually learning game rules like how their clothes had patches that couldn't be removed, how the Cat Team couldn't use elevators but the Dog Team could... and other such rules. The game had elements of team competition, and for entertainment value and fairness, the production team had tried to ensure each Cat Team member had a chance to win, for example—

They got Three-Five-Five as reinforcement.

But the Cat Team clearly hadn't realized that their team's real powerhouse was actually a cat.

Chu Tingwu planned to take advantage of this time gap.

As a member of the Dog Team, her task was to eliminate all cats, and although the Cat Team could revive through advertisements... no, through completing mini-tasks, these tasks were challenging, and those who couldn't complete them would be eliminated.

All mini-tasks were drawn without replacement, so once the simple tasks were used up, the difficulty would truly increase.

Chu Tingwu wore her mask properly as she toured the fifth-floor laboratory before heading toward the stairs.

The Pomeranian seemed somewhat idle and, turning around, spotted Chu Tingwu, noticing the young girl's open long coat with a sensor gun tucked into her belt.

Pomeranian: "...pfft."

Wouldn't it be better to hold the gun in hand?

Was this style learned from foreign films? It had a cute feeling of a child deliberately trying to look cool.

The Pomeranian hadn't decided which direction to go earlier because she hadn't planned her "role" in this episode.

This type of confrontational show would inevitably turn into a physical competition.

Because the Cat Team could fight back.

Now the two teams had different starting points - the Cat Team on the first floor, the Dog Team on the fifth floor. The Dog Team had to catch them and bring them upstairs, but if they went downstairs to confront them directly, they might get surrounded by cats.

Maybe she should team up with little Chu? Of course, they were already teammates, but after forming an alliance, they could move together, and group scenes usually got more screen time than individual ones—experienced variety show performers knew that group scenes were less likely to be cut.

Just as the Pomeranian was about to call out to Chu Tingwu, she saw the young girl peering down from the stairwell. Then, she supported herself on the handrail with one hand, silently leaping above the railing, reaching up to touch the stairs above as if measuring the width—

Then, Chu Tingwu jumped straight down.

Pomeranian: "?!"

With the gap in the middle of these stairs, jumping like this could result in falling straight from the fifth floor to the first floor and killing someone!

There was no sound from the production team in the earpiece, but the Pomeranian rushed to the stairwell. Looking down anxiously—

Chu Tingwu had jumped directly from the fifth-floor stairs to the fourth-floor stairs, and then from the fourth floor to the third!

Next door, the Alaskan was taking the elevator down, and before the doors even opened, Chu Tingwu had already swiftly and silently reached the second floor.

Then, with a light flip, even her last coat tail disappeared from the Pomeranian's sight, vanishing to who knows where.

Pomeranian: ...impressive.

She realized why Chu Tingwu wasn't taking the conventional route.

Compared to previous episodes, this episode's map wasn't actually very large, and the entire process probably wouldn't take too long.

Normal people knew that to explore rooms and go upstairs, there needed to be contact to create scenes.

So the two teams would likely gradually make contact, meet on the third floor, and eventually develop into a big melee.

The Pomeranian muttered, "The game has just started... The elevator makes noise when it opens, the map has stairs on both sides, but there's only one elevator. As soon as that Alaskan appears, he'll immediately attract everyone's attention."

So everyone would get the psychological suggestion that the Dog Team members would only use the elevator.

In fact, that was exactly the case—

Next door, the French Bulldog and Chihuahua were a step behind, standing there waiting for the elevator.

They discussed and decided to go to the third floor first, rather than doing a face-to-face confrontation with the enemy team like the Alaskan.

If at this time, Chu Tingwu reached downstairs at the same speed but not through the elevator, she could catch the others by surprise.

-

Chu Tingwu hadn't thought that deeply about it.

She just felt this way of going down was faster and didn't make obvious footsteps.

After reaching the second-floor stairwell, she heard footsteps next door—it was the Young Master exploring upstairs.

Coincidentally, the Young Master only needed the key hanging around Chu Tingwu's neck to complete his mission.

Currently, the Young Master was exploring the second floor—the layout was similar to upstairs, but all the glass had venetian blinds.

The venetian blinds weren't complete coverage; there were gaps between them, and sometimes when glancing through, one might mistake shadows in the gaps for people hiding behind them, giving oneself a fright.

The Young Master was crouching behind a flower pot searching while explaining to the drone camera:

"If I were the production team, I'd hide the A key in Room B that can only be opened with the B key, then the A key would open a room where you could find the C key... These are all typical patterns, but you can't start with such difficulty. Theoretically, the production team would give us a little sweetener at the beginning, like hiding it here—Found it!"

He couldn't find the key card after lifting the flower pot, but when moving it, the leaves on top shook. The key card wedged between the fake flowers fell to the ground.

Young Master: "It's □□... I'll go find Sister Tong to make a trade!"

Suddenly, a scream erupted from downstairs.

The Young Master startled, peeked down, and immediately saw the mad scientist wearing a dog mask. He quickly understood why there was a chase happening below:

It was like playing with water guns—even though you know the water gun isn't very harmful, just having the gun in someone else's hands makes everyone worried about getting their clothes wet.

Young Master: "I better go up another floor!"

The Alaskan had come down by elevator, and when he turned his head, he saw the elevator indicator change from 5 to 4, suggesting someone else was coming down.

The Young Master quickly ducked into the stairwell.

He had previously used the stairs to reach the second floor. Between the first and second floors, there was an indoor atrium design with artificial mountains, so you could observe the first floor from the second floor. But the third floor had a normal design.

The Young Master hadn't planned on using his [Exit] key before, since there was only one and he hadn't found a second one, but now he thought it would be better to find a place to hide first.

The third floor would be a good position—

At this time, others probably hadn't reached the third floor yet, while the enemies were planning to go to the first floor to brawl with their companions. He could completely unlock a room door, lock it from the inside, and wait for the battlefield to move to the third floor, getting some screen time and scenes during the multi-person confrontation.

["You have been attacked."]

The drone following him suddenly announced.

The Young Master, who was climbing the stairs, froze.

He instinctively crouched down, and then he heard a very distinct "loading" sound, coming from... above!?

"Bang!" This time, he heard a much softer shooting sound compared to the previous loading sound. As he looked up at the moment of the shot, he caught sight of Chu Tingwu's gun barrel—

She was positioned at the corner of the stairs between the second and third floors, one foot above and one below, just a few steps away from the Young Master.

She wore a golden retriever mask, and the key around her neck gleamed in the light.

Young Master: "!"

After being hit twice in succession, his instinct was to run away... perhaps rush into any room on the second floor to look for healing cards.

Earlier on the first floor, when everyone was exploring together, they had discovered an obvious rule—

[Being hit four times by the sensor gun results in loss of mobility.]

But at this moment, the gleaming key tempted him.

Just charge forward while covering your head!

He immediately lifted his foot and took large strides up the stairs, attempting to rush straight to Chu Tingwu with his last two health points... if he could get the key, he would be the first person from the cat team to clear the stage! At least the viewers would remember this "first"!

However, the Young Master hadn't considered why this opponent wasn't just peeking out to shoot, but rather shooting while standing on the railing.

The "Golden Retriever" figure suddenly flickered.

She seemed to leave only a brief afterimage in his vision, and in the next second, she had already leaped up from the corner between the second and third floors, taking several quick steps up half a flight, then turning in place, feet still one above and one below, standing on the corner stairs, facing the Young Master who had only made it halfway up.

The Young Master only managed a brief "ah" before the seemingly within-reach clearance key vanished before his eyes.

Then came another "bang."

The person holding the clearance key fired another shot at his back.

Within five meters, the shots were quick and accurate.

—But there's no need to prove it by shooting me!

The Young Master didn't want to play anymore!

He had thought he could sacrifice one life to reach his opponent, then use his adult male strength to snatch away the sensor gun and door key, gaining the upper hand.

But now, he had lost three health points and hadn't even touched the hem of her clothes.

He probably wouldn't be remembered by viewers as the first to clear the stage; he might instead be ridiculed as the first person to be eliminated!

I quit!

The Young Master backed away while shouting, "Sister Wang, Sister Ying, I'm sorry, I was wrong, please let me go, I'll lead you to find the other members of our team—"

He wasn't sure which female regular guest this was, so he called out both names!

But as he retreated to the second floor, trying to use the stairs to block Chu Tingwu's line of sight, hoping to preserve his last health point, he saw someone jump down from above!

The woman in the golden retriever mask leaped directly through the gap between the stairs, braced herself with one hand, and landed steadily beside the Young Master, then casually delivered the final shot.

["You have lost mobility, please do not resist, do not struggle..."]

Young Master: "..."

Would reaching for the key around her neck count as resistance? He wasn't really resisting, he just wanted to steal a key, and even without mobility, simply lifting a hand should be reasonable, right?

The next moment, the golden retriever mask beckoned: "Come upstairs, you're our test subject now."

The Young Master followed with sighs, but he wasn't quite sure if this was Sister Wang or Sister Ying? Sister Wang didn't seem this tall, and had Sister Ying's workout routine shown results so quickly? How did her athletic ability suddenly become so strong?

As he was thinking, someone suddenly jumped onto the handrail nearby.

The Young Master immediately crouched down, covering his head with both hands: "I'm already dead, you can't kill me again!"

He heard the sound of a door opening behind him and maintained his position as he turned to look, resulting in him falling onto his bottom on the stairs.

But he also saw clearly that it wasn't his unreliable teammates... a nimble cat had leaped out from behind the door!

What use could a cat be...

The large cat began climbing the stairs on all fours, her smoke-gray fur flowing with each jumping motion, almost appearing fierce. When she reached the Young Master's side, she let out a loud "Meow!" at the ceiling, then jumped onto the railing—

The Young Master only then noticed that the person in the golden retriever mask had vanished.

The cat seemed to patrol the area like it was her territory, circling around the Young Master while letting out two more "Meows."

Although the Young Master found it absurd, it seemed that the athletically gifted person in the golden retriever mask... had been scared away by this reinforcement cat?

The cat appeared to want to go upstairs, having already reached the third floor and stepping on the tiles. She turned her head to look at the Young Master: "Meow?"

Why aren't you following?

In his earpiece, the production team said: "You've lost mobility, unless a teammate or enemy comes to escort you, you can't move on your own."

The Young Master had a thought: "But this cat counts as our teammate, right?"

The production team was speechless for a moment: "Only teammates who could theoretically move an immobilized adult count."

In the plot design, he was supposed to be carried away by teammates after being shot four times.

But the cat couldn't hear the voice in the earpiece and was still questioning why the Young Master wasn't following.

The Young Master was touched: "Five-five-three... no, Three-Five-Five? Anyway, thank you, but I'm semi-eliminated now and can't move. Could you come down and keep me company?"

Everyone said this cat could understand human speech!

He now felt that the person in the golden retriever mask might return at any moment, and currently, the cat gave him a greater sense of security than his teammates.

Three-Five-Five: "?"

She went upstairs without looking back.

Young Master: "..."

What happened to understanding human speech? Or was she deliberately abandoning him? Cat, say something!

-

Three-Five-Five had gone to chase Chu Tingwu.

Before the show began, the production team had arranged with the cat's mother that this show would be like a simulation training at Jin City Training Base—

The cubs and five people wearing dog masks would play the role of enemies, while she would be the real police cat.

This wasn't Three-Five-Five's first time doing such training, and she had always performed well, but while other cats graduated and were sent to different police stations, Three-Five-Five had never gained real experience.

The production team was actually worried she wouldn't understand, especially since Chu Tingwu was her "owner"... but watching the tortoiseshell cat's performance through the cameras, they felt she not only understood but perhaps understood too well.

Before the tortoiseshell cat burst onto the scene, she had actually already dealt with Alaskan.

Alaskan's character in the show was meant to be this single-minded hothead, and he went straight to the first floor with his gun.

When the elevator opened, he ran straight into Cheng Luwei and immediately fired a shot.

Cheng Luwei was completely stunned.

However, he quickly reacted and hid behind a sofa, using what he had learned to exploit Alaskan's blind spot, then called out to his teammate: "Captain—"

Although the Captain was further away and Shen Dazui was closer, Cheng Luwei hadn't forgotten to maintain his character from the movie, and the production team had reminded him that only the Captain was truly trustworthy.

But Shen Dazui reacted first, as he had also been shot once.

Alaskan deliberately let out a villainous laugh: "Hehehe..."

Shen Dazui was furious: "Old Wu, you actually shot me!"

That's the problem with being too familiar – he could recognize who it was even with the mask on.

Alaskan: "You know too much, the organization sent me to send you to your grave!"

Despite his words, his gun barrel turned to aim at the Captain.

The Captain immediately hid behind a pillar, while Shen Dazui took the chance to run behind a glass half-wall.

Although there were four people in the small space, three of them were focused on hiding.

Now whoever had a gun was in charge, and those without guns didn't want to lose another health point.

Alaskan also realized he had been a bit too impulsive – going one against three could easily result in getting ambushed!

If only his teammates had kept up!

He was distracted for a moment when he suddenly noticed Shen Dazui looking behind him! Wait! Were Tong Bei and the Young Master on this floor too?

Just as this thought crossed his mind, Alaskan felt a heavy weight on his shoulder, as if something had struck him. He lost his balance completely, stumbling and dropping to one knee. His grip loosened, and a gray shadow darted past him from behind. He watched helplessly as his sensor gun slid across the floor, only to be pinned down under a cat's belly.

The cat meowed disapprovingly at Cheng Luwei:

"The cat's weight isn't enough to hold down the enemy, but I've already disarmed him. Shouldn't you be making your move now?"

Though they couldn't understand cat language, the current situation was clear enough. Cheng Luwei and the other two quickly moved forward with sinister grins, pinning down Alaskan—

And they yanked off his mask!

Alaskan: "This is blatant humiliation... it violates prisoner rights!"

"Hey, the cat!"

Indeed, Three-Five-Five suddenly turned around, dashing toward the end of the corridor, swiftly climbing the stairs and disappearing from everyone's sight.

The cat didn't bother explaining anything to the humans, but the Captain followed and brought back the "incapacitated" Young Master.

During this time, Alaskan was still complaining—

Alaskan: "Hey! Why am I the only one doing any work..."

If there had been others helping, would he have been disarmed by a mere cat?

At that moment, the Captain appeared around the corner supporting the Young Master. Unlike the other two who had been shot once, the Young Master's orange outfit was completely stained red, looking particularly tragic.

But to Alaskan, this was just his teammate's achievement... and while his teammate had managed a solo kill, there seemed to be no backup, resulting in their failure to bring the target back to the lab.

Upon learning that his attacker was Chu Tingwu, Alaskan changed his tune: "Well, besides me, only the Golden Retriever was actually working, everyone else was just slacking off!"

The Golden Retriever really was a person of their word! he thought.

Cheng Luwei: "..."

Somehow, they all felt like they'd been shot in the chest too—well, they actually had been shot earlier.

...But wasn't Alaskan basically mocking the cat team for having only one cat doing actual work? The humans were just riding on the cat's coattails.

Clearly, he wasn't the only one who felt this subtle mockery.

Shen Dazui: "We can't keep this prisoner. Let's execute him."

Alaskan: "???"

-

Chu Tingwu was playing a game of cat and mouse with Three-Five-Five.

Indeed, the "police cat" was invincible in this scenario because she... wasn't wearing a coat!

Without that orange cat coat, Three-Five-Five wasn't bound by the shooting rules. She could attack the dog-masked individuals at any time, though her current target was clearly her own cub.

Three-Five-Five's paws twitched eagerly, wanting to tear the mask off her cub's face.

"Ding"

The French Bulldog and Chihuahua's elevator arrived at the third floor.

The Chihuahua was saying: "I've got a good idea—instead of dragging the cat team members to the fifth floor after we incapacitate them, we should just confiscate their keycards."

French Bulldog: "?"

Chihuahua: "Cheng Luwei and his partner's mission is to rescue the hostages—twelve hostage pillows in different rooms. If they don't have enough pillows, neither of them can pass—that way Tong Bei can't help her teammates pass either. We'll use the keycards to win Tong Bei over to our side, have her snipe at crucial moments, and then eliminate her in the end. That way five of us can take down three!"

Production Team: You guys really have a lot of sneaky tactics==

The French Bulldog nodded as the elevator doors opened.

Chu Tingwu darted in, leaping between the two teammates, then suddenly jumped up, bracing against the elevator corner with their arms, spider-like, hanging from the elevator's upper wall.

Both teammates: "?"

Production Team: You've got quite the moves too==

Three-Five-Five gave chase into the elevator, and Chu Tingwu hurriedly said: "Quick, go! I'm her target!"

Though confused, the teammates knew they were on the same side and heeded the warning, quickly retreating from the elevator.

Three-Five-Five leaped up, landing on the elevator's central handrail, but still couldn't reach her cub.

She assessed the distance between herself and her cub, while giving a disapproving look at their strange posture.

As the elevator doors slowly closed, Chu Tingwu suddenly jumped down, deliberately stepping on the stainless steel railing. The railing shook, causing Three-Five-Five to lose her footing and slip into the gap between the railing and outer wall.

By the time the cat mother struggled free, the elevator doors had completely closed, and her cub had escaped.

The cat mother's face darkened as she looked up—

The elevator floor number was slowly changing from 3 to 1.

Meanwhile, Chu Tingwu breathed a sigh of relief... They had managed to dash out of the elevator at the last moment, and hadn't forgotten to press the elevator button for Three-Five-Five—how thoughtful.

But their teammates' expressions were still somewhat strange.

Chu Tingwu: "?"

The teammates pointed behind Chu Tingwu—

Your... your drone didn't keep up.

You moved too fast, and it got left behind! Now it's stuck in the elevator with the cat!

Chu Tingwu: "..."

The system controlling the drone: "..."

System: "QAQ!"